Please Do What You Can
words by Paul Spencer, 2006
to the tune of The Ham-Fat Man
Now come on all you workers and listen to my song,
I'm very rich and busy so I won't detain you long,
We're trying to oppress you without a lot of fuss,
And we're asking for your help to do the job for us.
Work laws, drug laws, property and theft,
Crowd laws, terror laws and holding back the Left,
It's more than we can handle so please do what you can,
To help with your oppression and the national plan.
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The point of being wealthy is having lots of stuff,
But if you want to keep it you must be pretty tough,
We started the police to enforce the rule of law,
And stop the flow of money back from rich to poor.
Now how can I get rich from the work that others do,
If the workers keep demanding a decent living too,
We brought in legislation to keep you on your knees,
And all I ask is that you just respect it please.
We've written nasty laws, and passed them in the hope,
That it makes us look as scary as Stalin or the Pope,
But trying to enforce them is more than we can do,
So a lot of your oppression will be up to you.
We put up lots of cameras to try and collar crime,
But we haven't got the people to watch them all the time,
We sometimes see graffiti or drunk men in a fight,
But mostly people pissing on the kerb at night.
Bricks and Windows
A guy and his girlfriend were walking down Main Street when she spotted a beautiful diamond ring in a jewellery store window Memory card. "Wow, I'd sure love to have that!" she said. "No problem, baby," he said, throwing a brick through the
glass and grabbing the ring. 徵信社
A few blocks later, his girlfriend was admiring a black
leather jacket in another shop window. "What I'd give to own that!" she said. "Sure thing, darling," he said, throwing another brick through the window and snatching the coat.
Finally, turning for home, they pass a Mercedes car dealership. "Boy, I'd do anything for one of those!" she said to her boyfriend. "Jesus, Christ! cnc lathe" he moaned. "Do you think I'm made of bricks or something?!"