Please Do What You Can

words by Paul Spencer, 2006
to the tune of The Ham-Fat Man

Now come on all you workers and listen to my song,
I'm very rich and busy so I won't detain you long,
We're trying to oppress you without a lot of fuss,
And we're asking for your help to do the job for us.

Work laws, drug laws, property and theft,
Crowd laws, terror laws and holding back the Left,
It's more than we can handle so please do what you can,
To help with your oppression and the national plan.

A - - - / A - - - /A - - - / D - - - /
A - - - / G - - - /Bm - - -/ E - - - /
A - - - / A - - - / A - - - / D - - - /
A - - - / G - - - / A - - - / A - - - /

A - - - / A - - - / A - - - / A - - - /
G - - - / G - - - / G - - - / G - - - /
A - - - / A - - - / A - - - / D - - - /
A - - - / G - - - / A - - - / A - - - /

The point of being wealthy is having lots of stuff,
But if you want to keep it you must be pretty tough,
We started the police to enforce the rule of law,
And stop the flow of money back from rich to poor.

Now how can I get rich from the work that others do,
If the workers keep demanding a decent living too,
We brought in legislation to keep you on your knees,
And all I ask is that you just respect it please.

We've written nasty laws, and passed them in the hope,
That it makes us look as scary as Stalin or the Pope,
But trying to enforce them is more than we can do,
So a lot of your oppression will be up to you.

We put up lots of cameras to try and collar crime,
But we haven't got the people to watch them all the time,
We sometimes see graffiti or drunk men in a fight,
But mostly people pissing on the kerb at night.